I "collect" strange things I thought I would never say, and those that I don't expect to hear. I have had two new entries into this collection in the last 24 hours.
Example 1: "That hurts my penis!"
We were in the car yesterday driving around a nearby town that I have always quickly dismissed as a place I wouldn't want to live. When choosing an area to go Geocaching, I decided to check out a place I'll just call CV (the locals will know). Although we found our "treasures" I confirmed that there was nothing in that town that would lure me to live there, but I digress. We were driving down one of the major streets that divide the town and it was a lot of small hills (I always think the white line in the middle of roads like that remind me of ribbons or of icing) and the two pint-sized passengers in the back are loving the hills and dips. Trying to "out WOOHOO" each other, one of them says, yep, you guessed it "That hurts my penis!". I probably don't need to mention it, but that came from my nearly 5 year old. My daughter. The same child who has been known to use the phrase, "O My Nuts!". She's confused. I'm only moderately concerned.
Example 2: "He Slept Around"
My older child (6 in March) has learned to read. This is good. This is also bad. Mommy loves to read, especially prose from witty, sarcastic women. I am currently reading Anyone But You by Jennifer Crusie. My son chose to read over my shoulder and read the following sentence perfectly: "Alex closed his eyes. 'Let me guess, he slept around.' Luckily, he was so proud of how well he read, that he didn't ask me to elaborate. Hey, it could have been worse - I had recently read a sentence that said, "The Chapter's Called Gone With Her Virginity"
Well, it looks like my moments of revelling in the youthful phrasing of my off spring is done. My daughter is now at my elbow and wants to know why I am typing. 'Till another time, friends...