Wednesday, May 23, 2007

Questions, Jr.

I knew all along that someone like me, who asks questions until they turn purple was bound to get repaid by the universe. I'd be forced to answer questions for eternity. What I didn't expect is that these questions would start at McDonalds.

As you know, yesterday was A's birthday. Being the gastronomically advanced child that she is - she chose McDonalds for dinner. We sit down with happy meals in tow - and then it happens. The first (of what I can only presume can be thousands more) question that I don't mind answering, but wish I didn't have an audience of Big Mac Munching Toothless locals.

Question from S: "Mommy how do babies get out of your tummy?"
Me: "Why do you ask?"
S: "I want to know. How do they get out?"
Me: "Most of the time, babies come out through our vaginas."
S: "What's a vagina?"
Me: "You know that already. It's what girls have instead of a penis. You have a penis, your sister has a vagina."
S: "You mean they come out your booty?????"
Me: "No, your booty is in the back, a vagina is in the front."
S: "And that's how a baby comes out?"
Me: "Yes"

A, who was listening, but not quite getting the whole gist of the conversation only wanted to know one thing: "How big is a Big Giant". Now, this may seem like a non-sequitor, but I'm thinking she heard "vagina" as "Big Giant" - lucky for me, S didn't pick up on the subtleties and told her that a big giant was about the size of four people standing on top of each other.

Those kids are going to be in for a rude awakening some day!

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